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Scion

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About Scion

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    Registered User
  • Birthday 10/21/1977

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  • Biography
    I have a daughter (6) named Amber, and a daughter (4) named Alanna, and a son Julian (1)

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    Wisconsin(US)
  1. Scion

    Abortion

    One statistic I heard not too long ago on the radio was something to the effect of: More children have been 'killed' by abortion in America than people murdered when Hitler took over and iradicated the Jewish population of Germany. I also heard of this site: (I believe it is a safe site) http://www.abortionfacts.com Personally it does bother me....I mean, some people say...what about the health of the mother, what about rape, what about incest. Yes, those are valid concerns and my own mother dealt with health issues as well. When she was pregnant with her third son they told her it would kill her...but she kept him and thank God he is alive and well today, in his 20's and serving in the Navy to protect our country.(yes she survived and is also a breast cancer surviver too, praise God) God says that His ways are not our ways, and that He has a plan for us...so I guess it's hard to know what matters more. Our own plans or perhaps the plans God may intend for that little one growing inside of a mother that doesn't want to have the baby. Typically the issues of Rape result in less pregnancies than people worry about. Perhaps there should be some options...I don't know. But it's hard for me to say that killing an unborn baby is the right one. I saw an educational presentation by a lady that at one time was a nurse aiding doctors in abortions. She showed some graphic pictures of aborted fetuses...it was heart wrenching. She talked about how guilty she felt and how God was healing her and that her mission was to educate people about the truth. To think that our society has come to the point where taking a nearly full term baby 90% out and stabbing it in the brain with scissors is considered humane....or pulling it out in parts and tossing away perfectly formed hands...hands formed by our Almighty God. What have we brought upon ourseslves as a people when the most vulnerable are considered expendable and ....just tissue to throw in the garbage. I guess I didn't realize this issued affected me as much as it does until I started writing. My heart goes out to all those that have chosen or been 'convinced' by others to abort their unborn..... I guess all in all God does give us the choice...between right and wrong...life and death...but...I think there needs to be more education on this issue...the real facts need to be presented. Many people have had issues with health, not being able to have children later, depression/guilt, horrified dreams, haunting thoughts etc. I guess I believe this is more than a convenient option to make life easier or safer for the mom to be and those involved....this shows the condition of our culture...where we have our focus....what we consider to be important and where we place our value. Not just an 'issue' to debate so that someone can get 'their' way. I believe in the 'right of choices' but I don't believe any form of murder should be allocated a legal choice. Murder is not legal...the Lacy Peterson case showed that Scott was guilty of murder and they were even afraid to say he was guilty of murdering the baby because of the implications upon abortion rights in saying the baby was a "murder victim".(sorry tangent) It's really sad for many many reasons.....it simply just breaks my heart...devistating. I don't think anyone would have to even wonder what God thinks about it all...there must be billions of babies up in heaven with the best dad in the world taking care of them. -my intentions were not to be hateful or insulting...I sincerely hope that no one was bothered by what I had to say...these were just heartfelt thoughts and emotions flowing freely as I typed what had intended to be a very short bit of opinion....
  2. I have never officially pursued getting a regular babysitter for my children. My husband and I at one time when I just had two worked opposite shifts so one of us was always home with the kids. (he worked 3, I worked 4) Well now we have three kids and occasionally when my husband and I would need to go somewhere there was either a childcare option available at the meeting or a relative would be available. But, my husband and I rarely needed to both be away, or I was nursing one of them and was not able to be away extended times.... Now schedules are different, kids are 5, 3, 1 and the oldest is in Kindergarten. Our schedules and volunteer/church events are keeping us busy and I guess I am foreign to the whole aspect of getting a babysitter. Many of the mom's I know can't relate because the've been using sitters since the day their kids were born nearly. For me I really wanted to provide the most time from myself or my husband to our kids...and I guess up until the past year or so was a tiny bit uncomfortable bringing someone into my home that I don't know and can trust with my children. Fortunately there is a college in our town with a great program for Early Childhood and also a lot of Campus Crusade students that work as babysitters for the church. Part of me would like to tap in to that resource, but I guess at the same time I know that there are a lot of people who already have and I am uncertain of who is available....and...well I guess I am wishing I would have an opportunity to get to know someone first before I just bring them in and leave my 3 kids home alone with someone they don't know. My kids are pretty good with new people, but my oldest takes quite a while to warm up to someone. Sorry to rant on, I suppose I could have made my point in half as many words. Have any of you had similar struggles and do you have any suggestions that would work for me?
  3. I don't know what you have worked out, but I tried to find some things to do as well. After my second child was born I *like an earlier poster mentioned* signed up with MaryKay. I would say that any 'at home business' or 'independent business' has the potential to work and earn a great income. Examples: Pampered Chef, MaryKay, Amway, Avon, etc. The key to a business working for you is if you feel you are gifted in the area of Sales. I learned early on that I am not a salesman "saleswoman". I have a very hard time trying to pressure someone to buy something or even ask them nicely. I would say that if you have drive, determination, and really good administrative skills, then try something like MaryKay or Pampered Chef (or another business). But if you don't think it's an area you are gifted in, perhaps trying something else would be easier. I kind of liked the Tutor idea that another person mentioned. Do you know of any ways to get involved with the school system or privately to have an in-home tutoring service or something? Perhaps even asking other parents that you know first and see if there is an interest there. It's possible that you could find enough people to supplement your income, while at the same time doing something your heart is already drawn to. Part of me would like to go back to work, and a huge part of me would love to find a great 'at home' job that won't cost me more than I can make...but for now I am home and I love the time with my kids too. I pray that God will direct your heart concerning all your options and that he will put people in your path to help you achieve your dreams. May God bless your family, Scion
  4. I am a stay at home mom (I haven't been back to this site for over a year) I have a 5yr girl, 3yr girl, and 1yr boy. My husband works 12 hour shifts but only 3 days a week. He does have 4 days off. Sometimes he is great at helping around the house and other times...well it seems like he doesn't do anything. Sometimes I go through cycles of 'overhaul' cleaning and have the house great...then I go through periods of time where I am so exhausted with the three kids and all the chores etc. that I let things slide and it's frustrating that if I don't do something for a day or two it doesn't get done at all. Then I get overwhelmed with all that has to be done. Once in a while he'll step up and do a load of dishes if we are out of clean ones...LOL. Not that I want to tear apart at the things my husband does do...he's great at providing our income and has kept a steady full time job at the same company for the duration of our marriage. He is great at story time with the kids and spending time with them. I once told him that it would be helpful if he would just help out a little more around the house to help me maintain it, not that he has to heavy duty clean something. He wanted to know what to do and asked me to make him a list. I didn't think I should have to 1) ask and 2) make him a list, so I just said... 'well if you see something around the house that needs to be done ie: tidying up, putting away some toys, etc. then do it as you walk by.' He said to me, if I did that I'd always be cleaning up something all the time. My thoughts were EXACTLY...what does he think I do with three kids 5 and under all day? Sometimes I just wish it was easier for men and women to 'connect'. I'm kind of an odd mix...part of me is OCD neat freak...while at the same time I can get easily defeated in something *such as a big mess* and not be able to do it for a day or two until I can get over the mental hurdal. He does laugh at me for having to load the dishwasher exactly the same every time and putting all the dishes and glassware in the exact same place/way every time too. I have been getting better at not being bothered by clutter as much as I was before. I think my husband isn't as concerned with the look of the house every day, but for me it is a major stress factor. If the house could be moderately clean every day, and not just one room, I would have a million years less stress. My hopes are that as we learn how to be parents over the years with trial and error..and take care of running a home, that it will get easier and we'll get better at it. In the mean time I'm just reading parenting books, marriage books, and meeting with a mom's group from church once a week. ^.^ Well if any of you can relate or want to talk feel free to send me a note. I will try to get on here more often. I am not even sure what happened to the posts I had up before I had to stop comming last year.
  5. Hello Heidi I don't come in every day because honestly I get a little lost in which threads I was on or which ones are current At present I am a SAHM because I am roughly 33weeks pregnant. I have a 4 1/2 year old girl Amber, and a 2 1/2 year old girl Alanna. This time around we are expecting a boy and hope to name him Julian. I don't know if you've seen my posts, but I tend to write a lot as well. As of August 14th I will be married 6 years ^.^
  6. Scion

    Alcohol

    Personally I choose not to drink alcohol. I did in my teens when I went through depression and some bad things in life...I drank off and on...but nothing good ever came out of it because when it was "on" time it was bad. I feel God freed me from that "vice" in life and honestly I have no desires for it what so ever, in fact the smell of it turns my stomach. I have not consumed alcohol for more than 6 years. *one exception, my mom got some champagne for a toast at the hotel when my husband and I got married. We did not have alcohol at our wedding. Since then though, my husband does consume an occasional mixed drink. I don't like having it in the house, but he is alright with it. He grew up in a family that considers drinking to be acceptable, in moderation, when you are of legal age to do so. As far as it being a "sin". *shrug* I think that the apostles reccomended that we didn't "get drunk" and that those in ministry should not drink. It seems many different people have different convictions on this issue. I don't know if it is a sin in moderation...I mean...caffeine is a "drug" as well, but it seems natural for many to grab a soda/pop 3 or 4 times a day and chug it down..or drink coffee by the pot. Is any of it completely healthy...*shrug*...I don't know, probably not. But we never look at caffeine the same way we do alcohol even though both are addictive and both affect our bodies, brains, and moods. Some people even consider smoking a sin, while others do not...there are many terrible drugs and agents in ciggarets, but it is somewhat socially acceptable, although addictive, cancerous, and smelly. I know that parts of the bible say that our body is a temple for God and to take care of ourselves...does that limit to drugs/tattoo's/piercings...or even to overindulgance at the local fast food places. Does eating poorly count as not taking care of ourselves in God's best interests? It seems easy to draw the line visually or mentally at what is sin and what isn't...what seems worse than another...but really...overall I guess it is between that person and God. We can feel many things are a sin, but in this day and age it seems "incorrect" to approach someone on anything. It seems many years ago, or even in the bible...people could confront someone on their sin and they would take what the person said to heart.(Nathan & David as an example) Now a days it seems we aren't allowed to say something is a sin. I understand the idea of the plank in our eye with the dust speck in theirs...and that for the most part we don't need to be doting over other people to see if they are sinning...but when it is someone close to you, that you know personally...and you see them struggling with something, I think it is possible to come to them in prayer and compassion and help them through it. I think for the alcoholic, alcohol may be a sin in their life because they are relying on the alcohol to relieve pain, depression, problems, and when something goes wrong they aren't seeking God...but seeking the bottle. I guess overall...anything that replaces God in your life is a sin...if you are seeking that thing to fill the void instead of God... ((sorry...I ramble))
  7. Hey, I joined not too long ago...but got busy...and didn't come in very often. I have a 4yr old (Amber) and a 2yr old (Alanna) and we are expecting our third in September I was working again until this pregnancy but had only been working for 6 months when I found out I was pregnant. It wasn't a job safe to do pregnant so I haven't beeen working since February. The ultrasound said we would be having a boy this time around so it is very exciting...yet a little scary to know I'll be going into labor in roughly 8 weeks -give or take- Hopefully we'll be able to find some things to get going, we had given away all our baby items to my husbands family members who were having kids. Even gave our crib away 2 weeks before we found out we were expecting again. It was a lovely crib too, but my sister-in-law was blessed by it. Fortunately my mom found an older metal crib at a thrift sale for $30.00, it's a little girly...but I don't want to pay for all new baby stuff if this will be our last child. Just praying that we won't have to break the bank on baby items and that family will help out some...considering we bought all new stuff with the first child, a little bit with the second, and then handed it down to other family to save them money. I have bought some clothes on sale...trying not to get in 'shopping overload', LOL We also struggle a little with our 4 year old in the potty training...she has been getting better, but continues to regress everyonce in a while. Can't consistantly keep her in underwear and out of pull-ups. Unfortunately right now the little one has a bladder infection so we are hoping she gets better soon. We plan to name our son Julian, not sure on a middle name, perhaps my late grandfather's name. He passed away when I was 7 years old, and it would tie together both sides of my family being that it wasn't only my paternal grandfathers name, but my maternal great grandfathers name (Wesley). Sorry to ramble...I don't have too many people to talk to ....and I get carried away.
  8. Well a diagnosed behavorial issue is definately a struggle, do they have some type of therapy available where there can be someone one-on-one with him? I saw that you said his teacher couldn't handle him, so perhaps it is something your husband and you will have to discuss about your work schedules. It could be likely that it is an outcry from the disrupted home schedules. When I was working *right before this pregnancy* I worked 4 days a week on the night shift(10 hr shifts) and my husband worked 3 days a week on the early shift(12 hr shifts). It was stressful for me at first because I had pretty much done all the main duties around the house and with the kids...but when we were splitting the week and the kids were with him during the week and with me on weekends...it was really hard. He wouldn't stick to their schedule and if I brought it up I was "telling him what to do" and he insisted that he could take care of it "his" way. I tried to tell him that it wasn't about my way or his way, but that I wanted to work together to keep some type of consistancy in their routiene. I feel young children need consistancy and in some cases structure. They need to know that their parents care, and that we are here for them to help them take on each day. My husband would not really take as much of a hands on approach during his time and then when I got the kids on the weekends they were crazy and hyper and wouldn't mind me what-so-ever...it was driving me crazy and I was getting angry and stressed out. My husband blamed me for getting frustrated and said it was fine when he had them. Well, not to be on a spouse bashing rant...but once I stopped working again and came home it took a while, but I eventually got a routiene worked out. I don't know if my husband follows it much, but I still do the majority of the childcare in the home so I think it balances out to have better good days than "off " days. I am unaware of your current financial requirements or job situations, but I do know one thing...perhaps it would be good to find out if one of your jobs can be more flexible...or make it so that you have one or two days off together. Which coming from a situation where we both worked I know it can be hard. Today there is a lot of stress for both parents to work, to pay bills and things...but from experience I have seen that the most important factors in a young child's development are the time spent with the parents. They need to see you and your husband interact...and for the sake of your relationship you and your husband need at least one day off together...even at times perhaps a few hours alone without the kids. I spent many years isolated when the kids were first born, no friends or family nearby....and I was going nuts. I finally found a Mom's group near to me last summer and we meet once a week. A babysitter watches the kids downstairs and we come together for an hour and a half or so to talk about life, pray for each other, discuss books or other life issues. It was really hard for me to transition my life to fit it in, but I don't regret any of it. Perhaps if your church doesn't have one you can start one or help get one started. I hope that you can find solutions for your son that help him as well as you all cope with the behavorial issues. Have you discussed all possible reasons with his doctors? My youngest brother had food sensitivity issues, if he had anything with SOY products or red dye he would be out of control hyper...like almost beyond what he was even aware of, it caused problems in preschool, school, and elsewhere until they narrowed it down and adjusted his diet. After that things got much better for him. I will keep your family in my prayers. When your son has his outbursts are there any warning signs that you notice before it happens, things he says, does, ways he looks in the face or other things? I pray that God will give you the patience to deal with this situation and that God will work in your son's life to heal him of this tendency to have these out of control outbursts.
  9. Hey Besser, is your son older or younger of the two children you have? For me my older child has for the most part always minded my husband and I and usually our only struggle with her is punishment (time-outs) and potty training. My second child however (2 1/2 years old) is one to test limits and tune us out, break the rules consistantly and you name it, she's into everything, climbing everything, taking apart everything. She has been walking since she was 8 months old to keep up with her sister and is only 2 inches shorter than her sister who is 2 years older than her...she has always acted and seemed older than 2 so many times it is hard for me to remember how young she is. I used to give her a swat on the back of her bottom or on her hand and tell her NO firmly and why she couldn't do it, however she didn't care and wouldn't listen to us. Eventually I started incorporating two things, one of which works better for my older child, the second works best for my younger. The first thing I did was make a star chart. I have 5 categories in which they can earn a star sticker each day and it really motivates my 4 year old. The 2 year old likes the stickers but for the most part could care less if she loses a star. Some days she is upset, but gets over it quickly. The second thing I tried was "time-outs", a lot of mom's I know say that they can't get it to work with their children...and I know I tried a long time ago...but thank God this is working now. I've been doing it for nearly 6 months and have seen dramatic improvements. I discuss with them what is acceptable and not acceptable. If they start doing something I give them a warning and say, if you choose to continue doing that you will get a time out. If they need a time out I have a soft chair in the same place all the time that is the "time-out chair" Since my younger child is 2 she has 2 minute time outs, my 4 year old has 4 minute time outs. Kids this young can't stand even that short of a time out so sending them to their room for longer almost defeats the purpose. After the time out I have them come over to me and we discuss the situation. I ask them to tell me if they understood why they had a time out and then we talk about it. I am so amazed how it changed my youngest...she responds to this structure a lot better than the older. Not to say she doesn't get in trouble at times...but she understands that when we say it's a time-out she goes straight to the chair. Also keeping your cool is a plus, if you can keep your cool when they are acting just terribly things seem to smooth over better. If you need to step away from the situation for a minute so you don't blow up it helps too. I know it's a lot that sounds easier said than done...and it took a lot of patience on my part to follow through with it until the kids realized I meant business and it wasn't just a temporary thing. I know of some books that I have read that helped me think about perspectives in parenting and relating to such young children. If you would like to discuss them with me I wouldn't mind. If you want to talk further about the issues with your son feel free to contact me. If you don't have Yahoo...we can talk here. (Still working on my 2 1/2 year old biting...she bites her older sister when she gets really mad, we have gotten it to where it rarely happens, but it still happens...I think each kid is different when it comes to biting, but perhaps there is a lot of anger or tension present that is flowing out from him when he is using hitting and biting against you.)
  10. I'm just going to throw my 2-cents in to this thread although I think the poll is old For my first pregnancy I wanted to go medication free because I was fearful of any possible consequences of the drugs affecting my child. One thing my doctor neglected to inform me on was that my uterus was tipped back. Unfortunately having a child in that situation increases the back labor and causes his/her head to be somewhat jammed into my tail bone for a lot longer than a normal delivery would probably be and quite painful as well. I recall waking up just as my husband left for work at 4:30am feeling some sort of pain..I honestly wasn't sure if it was contractions or some type of bowel issues...but decided to get the stopwatch just the same. I realized they were already 5 minutes apart and they were getting stronger. I phoned my husbands boss and he returned home. I did all I could to do that delivery naturaly...but I seriously thought I was going to die. Her head got jammed pretty bad and they had to try to use the vacuum extractor to loosen her head. And also with it being my first, I was not really good at the pushing and felt as if I was squishing her more than pushing her. Unfortunately the vacuum kept falling off and every time they replaced it I was cut open inside. Once she was finally born (thank GOD) they weighed her and she was 9 pounds 2 ounces....very large first baby, and a girl. Also her umbilical cord was wrapped around her neck twice and the DR said that thankfully it was unusually long because it didn't strangle her being born. I was sad with the very large scabby on her head from the vacuum extractor and she had a dark blue vein around her eye. It is still visible if you look close, but most people don't notice it. The trauma of that medication free delivery scared me towards having more children...but I was certain that God would help me if we were to have more. I had to have stitches for half an hour, internally from the vacuum extractor...and had to recover in the hospital for 4 days. *not typical for a vaginal birth* But she was the most beautiful baby! My second child was also entirely different from the first experience. She was overdue and I was worried about her being as large as the first one. I came in for an induction, but the DR decided to get coffee first while I got ready in the room. While he was gone my labor started. (thank God or the pitocin would have nearly killed me) The contractions started about 3 minutes apart and just started overlapping after that....the nurse kept watching my chart and I was just dying in pain. I knew that I would have to get some type of medicine this time because I would never make it to the pushing stage when I was getting no break from my contractions. They told me they would give me a "partial epidural" ((my friend who's husband is a DR said she has never heard of that term, but that is what the nurses said to me when I was having my second child.)) It helped take the edge off, however due to the fact that I get motion sickness....it caused me to be extremly disorientated, nauseaus, and voiding my stomach at every muscle movement in my body. The whole event became surreal and very uncomfortable. When it came time to push I didn't wait for the contractions and just started pushing and pushing and pushing because I didn't want the pain medicine to wear off and I just wanted it to all be done. Unfortunately I fear I may have damaged my tail bone in the process. She ended up being 8 pounds 10 ounces. Not as large as her sister in weight, although she looked bigger. My recovery was only 2 days in the hospital, but I couldn't get out of bed for a couple weeks because of the severe pain in my lower back. I was near ready to go to the DR to see if it was serious, praying that God would help me with this tremendous pain...when the next day I woke up to call the pain was gone. *please keep my second child's health in your prayers, she has a condition called *Alpha-1 Antitrypsin Deficiency.* I am about to face my third delivery in 3 months -give or take God's timing in the matter-, I am uncertain if I should go drug free....use an epidural....or ask about my options. So far I am not freaking out, but I know when it gets close to baby day...I am going to have a hard time not getting cought up in the mental stuggle of memories of delivery and pain and such. (prayers would be great on that one ) Thanks to all those that took the time to read my novel, I mean post. LOL
  11. Hey, there have been a few posts in here since I was last in. That's cool. Is it ok to just continue replying to current posts here or are we supposed to talk in another thread? -- Hi Besser, How do you mean "I am in a way a single mom" ? The other comment "you all seem so perfect" LOL, not laughing at you...but I can't imagine you are including me in that comment..I've only had two posts...I wouldn't say I feel "perfect" anything but perfect most days. I think there are few people who get through life without some form of "breakdown" here and there. We are human, we have emotions...and stress...and trials...but where you aim you focus really affects how you handle the trials and things. And truthfully we don't always make the best choices in life...but thankfully God knows that and forgives us...the hard part is US forgiving ourselves or others around us. Isn't it funny we feel that we have to be good enough for forgiveness or others have to earn it from us...when God just forgives us if we ask Him. I think for you God would have you take things one step at a time...work through your situation and pray when you can. Ask God for wisdom in choices for you and your family, for strength during times of stress, courage to face the day, and grace when you can't handle all that is on your plate. ~ How old are your children? Mine are 4 and 2...and the toddler years are full of ups and downs...I seriously can't get my 4 year old to consistantly potty train with out regressing once or twice a month. I am expecting my first boy in September and so far this pregnancy has gone smoother than my first two. I don't know if it has to do with the gender or other factors. I struggle with stress very much...I also wouldn't mind getting to know some of you as well because I have marriage issues I would like to discuss with some other married women. Not to dump on my husband, but more so to see if I am the one who is thinking wrongly in the situation and how I can adjust my thinking, behavior, and responses in a proper way. Well there I go rambling on...I sure can type a lot...well I'll try to stop in every so often...and I hope it was ok to post here...still not sure which threads to use and what not....kind of new to this sort of thing.
  12. I am new, but looking at the dates on these threads it makes me wonder if anyone uses this site now or if no one comes to this thread anymore? I am totally new to this site and hope to find a place to talk about life issues with other christian mom's
  13. (Hi, I'm new) Well I have a 4yr old and a 2yr old. We try to get bedtime going around 8:00-8:15...but usually they don't go to sleep for while no matter what we do. In the winter we would have them go to bed at 8:30 and they wouldn't get up until about 8:00 or later in the mornings...but now since spring started they usually get up at 6:00am/7:00am (varies), usually no later than 6:30am for the younger one. They still take a two hour nap during the day so once they no longer need a nap time, I am not certain if bedtime will remain the same. The hardest part about convincing them to go to bed at 8:00/8:15 in the summer time is that where we live there is still daylight outside. I didn't know 8:00/8:30 was keeping kids up late, especially if they are nappers or don't have school but I don't know. *shrug*

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